When my ex crippled me on Mother’s Day in 2020, I lost consciousness when he hit me in the spine with the metal bottom chair, and upon losing consciousness, I met God.
I was brought back to life from God, this happened every time I lost consciousness from what is called, autonomic dysreflexia.
In that time period, I lost consciousness seven times.
I began questioning God‘s plan and also not wanting to be brought back to life. My body was slowly dying, given the fact that a neglected spinal cord injury causes a lot of secondary issues, including inner organ damage.
Add to that the medical torture, being sprayed with nervine, forcibly oppressed, poisoned, and I was treated like something was wrong with me, instead of the people who caused this; why on earth would I want to be on this planet?
In many cultures when an animal is a cripple, they put it down. They recognize the fact that It can’t survive on its own as a crippled creature.
In the United States of America, there is this supposed underlying scripture, that people are ‘cared’ about in this country.
It is clearly untrue.
They pick and choose who is cared about, based off of, not even truth.
Most of the time many of the people who caused this to be my life, who are liars, and yet, they hold places in society and never worry about anything.
If the United States of America was going to care about cripple people or anyone for that matter then they would’ve by this time. Right now.
The judge decided my fate when she decided I didn’t deserve the disability that I paid him for 22 years, that money would’ve been to redesign the light for me but I otherwise am unable to do. As has been proven over the past four years.
It would’ve been much better and more gracious of society to just “put me out of my misery“ back then.
What was the point of pretending that I could have a good life, giving me hope for the future, when they were just going to medically torture me, oppress me, target me and torment me?
It must be fun for them, to decide people fates and lives, so cavalierly. I’ve actually seen what people do when they care about someone’s life, so I know the difference between a society that cares and one that doesn’t. This one is a society that helps the people who harm the most.
I just watched it happen.
My ex that crippled me that holds a place in society, the woman who trafficked me as a teenager holds a successful place in society, the women who lied and caused this to be my life that holds a place in society, or without anyone ever holding them accountable, and yet they watch me die and think nothing of it.
I paid into my disability Social Security for 22 years that I worked before being crippled.
When I applied for that money and they denied me the first time, everyone told me it’s ‘normal.’The second. ‘It’s normal.’ The third. ‘It’s normal.’ Now the fourth-it isn’t normal….
Just like everyone staying silent isn’t normal. Nazi germany stayed silent too.
Is it normal to be medically tortured, normal for them to cover up your MRI via coding?
Is it normal to be sprayed with nervine, for things ‘done in the name of Allah?’
Is it normal for Community to think that your life is a game and funny? Is it normal to be harassed by helicopters?
Despite more than enough medical evidence, a judge has now decided that my life is not worth saving. My third disability trial that I had in November 2023 was denied, it’s caused me to be in credit card debt after I left last year to save my own life. No one here has been bothered at all by the many things I posted, I endured & they consistently parrot off, things like ‘its ‘algorithm,’ or ‘it’s normal.’
Despite more than enough medical evidence and more than enough money that I paid him for myself over the 22 years I worked, this judge decided that my life doesn’t mean anything. During my fourth appeals they evidently decided the same thing. I wonder where all that money that I paid in goes? Who receives that money?
That judge decided my fate and decided that my life did not matter. Must be so nice to have so much power.
In World War II when a leader killed off people that were crippled, the world was outraged.
I find it odd the World is outraged by the past, while making those mistakes in the future, even though we are still alive….for now. Never forget what has occurred in the past, it’s the same cycles, but how about caring about life now?
Evidently the United States of America, found a way to make being nazis less obvious, so that they wouldn’t be as hated, though their actions do the same thing.
I would’ve rather been put out of my misery right away, instead of having hope for the future, hope that people would care, hope that I would find a place in society, even as a crippled now. Hope that my life would matter.
I fought so hard to get away from the man that crippled me, the one that was trying to kill me.
What was the point? I should’ve just let him kill me.
I see the truth now and I will never unsee it.
I see so clearly that people choose who matters here based off lies. I see so clearly the people that caused it, and I will never ever ever think of the United States of America, the same again.
What I had to endure before my ex crippled me was too much, what you have made me endure since, is unforgivable.
I don’t have kids, I never have, I don’t have a spouse or a community that needs me, or cares about my life, I have myself struggling to get people to care, in a World and society that doesn’t give a damn about the people. It’s too busy caring about the ones who caused the most amount of harm.
I have no desire to continue to ““ fight for my life“
What’s the point. They’ve damaged my inner organs so badly that it’s irreversible. They’ve slowly tortured me to my death, while letting the women who caused it, think that it’s funny. I live in a camper with no heat and they are pleased to see me frozen. Literally. Like everything else isn’t enough. Shame on the Disabiity judge and shame on them too. Every person involved.
I am thoroughly disgusted with everything about the United States of America right now, it’s no better than Nazi Germany.
In fact, it’s worse than Nazi Germany. Nazi Germany would’ve put me out of my misery the second I was crippled.
At least then I would’ve been with God instead of slowly tormented by society and a community who lies.
So while over the past four years I walked around until I fell down with a spinal cord injury, I used to walk until I would crawl by the Seaside, hoping that someone would see me, recognizing me and care. Sending a spinal cord doctor or help. I posted on social media. I went to the doctors, I did self study and research to further find out what is going on with my body. I attempted to go back to school, in which they drop the funding a few weeks before I started. I had my business and I planned on implementing into my life a little by little, but since I’ve been crippled decided I should do it now. That made no money. I’ve been painting regularly, trying to sell my sub par paintings, I’ve worked really hard to try and make something work out for me on earth hell. To save my own life I left on foot with a walker and a spinal cord injury, I flew out of the country hoping that I would be able to find medical refuge.
That judge decided my fate though, she decided my body, my life, did not matter.
So now it’s completely pointless. I live in a place that there is a real and likely outcome of me freezing to death.
This is why I left last year.
That was it, that was me trying to have a good life, that was me trying to save my own life, and instead I just got put into debt and the people who triangulated and put me in danger here, using me as a scapegoat, just put me in more danger there.
Everyone taking the opportunity to make their own lives better, by watching me die.
I have another upcoming MRI, the United States of America is not going to be honest about it.
If they were going to be honest at all, they would’ve been about the MRI they already covered up via coding back in 2021. Now it’s just jumping through their hoops, like I’m some kind of circus pet of theirs, so that they can try and backpedal, to get away with what they’ve done to me.
I’m not something on display for them to use as sport or a pawn. They’ve already taken away everything that I had, including my dignity and now I have no respect for any of them.
I see them for what they are clearly now.
Most of all I see and I understand that in the United States of America, my life as a crippled woman in the lowest financial and societal bracket, has no benefit to any of them.
I guess since I’m no longer working incredibly hard, paying into my Social Security, so that somebody who’s lying, can receive it, instead of me, my life doesn’t matter to them.
Most importantly I would like to leave this earth with my dignity intact. What little is left that hasn’t been exploited inaccurately.
Everyone involved had a chance to tell the truth before I left on foot.
Now I don’t even care, let the world see them all for what they are.
Liars and web traps.
Maybe then the wrong people won’t be blamed.
Maybe then, the World has a chance.
What has happened to me is not only unforgivable, it’s unacceptable and NO- United States of America’s, parrots and chickens, it’s not normal.
Death with dignity.
There are many different options for it, and I definitely qualify, especially in a country where medical professionals don’t care about big Pharma payout and care about the actual patient.
That judge decided my life didn’t matter, the death with dignity go fund me is to pay off my credit card debt (Credit card debt that I have by saving my own life, that’s what paid my rent and got me groceries when I was in South America, I didn’t go on vacation like some privileged white women made it seem)hopefully in addition to paying those off, I can end up in a country where the medical professionals care about making advancement for spinal cord injury, and then they can talk to me like a human being, instead of a number and help me decide whether I wanna be on this earth or not. They can actually tell the truth about my injury. Instead of cover it up via coding like the USA.
Given my social economical status it is incredibly unlikely for me to survive this. That judge decided my fate. Again.
I refuse to let people put me in danger like they already have.
I am part of a spinal cord walker’s group that spans the world, there are so many people that I could help, if only people in the United States of America had cared about humanity, instead of their pocket.
My goal is to raise enough money for myself, to pay off my credit card debt and get myself to a country that allows death with dignity. Then I can talk to the medical professional, one that is not in big pharma’s pockets, and I can actually work toward helping people with spinal cord injury. A physician that can help me end my life, instead of slowly torment me to my death.
I deserve to die with dignity. This game the United States of America just played, making a joke out of everything I’ve experienced, all for the benefit of the scum who put me through it, it is not OK. I’m not a game. Or their circus pet, willing to jump through hoops because they LIE.
They sealed their fate.
They had a chance to be honorable. They are not.
In a World of chickens, be an Eagle. Or atleast stay human.
I am
Katherine Lily Mae Harris
38 in 2024
Woman
Life
Freedom
USA