Blog by: Katherine Lily Mae Harris
I rewatched ‘Limitless’
It’s the movie about a man that gets into a new ‘up and coming’ rich people drug and then is in danger beyond his wildest dreams because he is an utter idiot at times and then utilizes this newfound capability he has found within the new ‘use of this drug………..’and what I realized is:
that movie, is about people that are neurotypical and want to be autistic.
Think about it.
He is using parts of the brain he wouldn’t otherwise, causing for him to have what seems like ‘super human’ abilities, and then he crashes when he isn’t using this drug.
Autistic people ‘crash’ because we can’t fit into a neurotypical World. And neurotypical people are trying to create a drug that utilizes their ‘autistic trait’ brain……?!
Wow. And they want to do it all, without any type of danger…….
Want to know when in my own life I was-Limitless????
I became limitless When I stopped spending time with fake friends, when I stopped dating. When I got my dog. When I focused on my #hobbies. My #goals and dreams. Then I was limitless. Make those goals and cross them off.
I had multiple regular jobs, I worked all the time, but had lots of time and #energy to, devote to my hobbies and dreams.
Do you know what ‘drug’ I used in that time???
None.
Not one.
Unless #icecream counts.
That’s the only thing I can think of, that I included in my life regularly that could be considered a drug.
I didn’t drink, didn’t smoke, didn’t use medications, I was happy. I did all the things I used to do when I was young and had free time, that made me feel happy.
I set goals and crossed them off my list.
It was so fulfilling.
After all the #trauma I survived and moved on from, I didn’t let anything stop me. I was determined to make my #dreams come true.
I never judged others on their choices that were unlike mine at that time.
Then I ended up in a relationship with my abuser. He crippled me.
Now #life has been drastically different.
It was different the four years we were together too. I learned more about myself. I was in danger for a long time. I learned how #forgiving I am. Too forgiving.
I am so #grateful I got away from him.
I have been alone since, over five years now.
I was excited to move forward and determined to heal. Determined to my own detriment.
It was really hard to experience what just happened to me, after everything I survived young.
I think too many people took for granted how safe they always have been.
That the people who put me through this are still here, and that all the things I survived made me their liability.
I survived.
I survived.
I
#survived.
Limitless.
To be #limitless means to ‘know thyself.’
I opened a book at the age of 19 and saw that phrase, then I did it.
When you #knowyourself, you end up becoming better and better.
Learning about #astrology helps piece it together as well.
It tells you how to lean in to your strengths and how to work on your weaknesses. It’s pretty bold about them as well.
I like that.
Bold.
In order to re-ignite #neural pathways that your #brain #created when you were young, you just remember what you were doing then.
I learned the #piano when I was very young, so me remembering the shapes the ladies hands made, as they taught me (I seated beside them and seeing their hands.) That helped me utilize parts of my young brain.
It helped me get out my emotions, gave me a hobby when I couldn’t sleep (from the injury) and allowed for me to continue trying to heal. The ways I had access to.
I used marijuana sometimes to heal. Other times I didn’t.
I stayed #focused and #motivated. Kept a schedule.
All the things I really like to do.
#Art was pretty major for me too.
The goal was to do everything and anything I could think of, to keep my brain and body connected.
#Integrated.
A man crippled me.
I needed to #heal.
So I just continued to think of ways to keep my #mind and #body #United;
a spine hit, is major.
#Bellydance is #neurology activated. I was fortunate for that.
I just continued to think of the ‘things I could do.’
Like a great article I was #inspired by, about life after #spine injury.
Given even after three shoulder repairs, in one year, I would have been fine. I would have found a way to make a great life and make my dreams come true.
I would have been able to, make my dreams come true, after he did that, after he crippled me, I could have, had life been different……..I guess tearing me apart and putting me in more danger, while laughing was more fun.
Now in the #future.
I think about all the little things that need to occur, to make my life become semi normal, before I can move forward.
I think of the little things I’m excited about.
The things that keep me going.
#Healing is a messy process and it sometimes looks like, realizing that adapting to an injury is better than trying to accomplish what you could have before hand.
A new limitless.
Within this ‘#new bodies’ limitations.
Limitless within limitations.
Luckily my brain doesn’t have any limitations.
My #spirit is #infinite.
My body is healing or adapting.
I will keep moving forward.
Happy #Holidays, whatever you celebrate or don’t.
I did #Solstice Magick.
I will keep looking forward.
I will keep attempting to see what I still am capable of.
I will continue to speak up.
I will continue to live.
However long or short I’m meant to.
To be limitless.
#Believe in yourself
#Love yourself
Know thyself,
#Live your life.
Photo of Persaeus and I from 2016 🌈💔🐾